beached

rough shell, 

grit and sand surround you
smooth, center, soft and inviting 

singing the oceans song through your fixed throat

stars illumine the heart of you 

galaxies contained in your depth
easy to overlook in your ordinary crusted cape
yet so quick to yield your intrinsic beauty with
minimal manipulation by my hands
we are similar 

you and I

both of static and waiting; 

what we posses inside is 

secreted and silent

i will be my own hand and 

Turn This Beauty Inside Out
I will pluck myself from the sea 

I will radiate the cosmos that made me
It will light my way into remembrance
I am always home and 

I am made of stars

Parenting

parenting
parenting is not for wimps
she said with a smile that
was conspiratorial in nature

parenting
has moved me to scream
find myself curled in the
corner, a shell

parenting
has brought me joy
the tears of first flesh
warm in my arms

parenting
is the road i travel
intertwined, destined
until death

parenting
i am
parenting

Vortex

Well, today has been a bust.  

Rise to the surface, take a breath and feel the sun on our faces only to be pulled down by the whirlpool of drama that stems from so much in this family.  The line that demarcates where to push and where to yield is more of a broken path of breadcrumbs than a definitive line.  This ambiguity brings with it so much pain, fear and tears.  

Couched in the many layers of culture, familial upbringing, historical interaction and disappointment; the smallest disagreement can and often does spin into a vortex of dissension and upheaval.  So, here I sit with a post-emotive hangover with a household suspended in inaction.

Pull

pull

gravity, they say, is

the power that intuits the

growth of all things green,

the power that brings

my skin, my bones

to a place of quiet rest

gravity is a lesson

to be learned;

the moment when

one realizes that

omnipotent forces exist

waiting to be met

my son with his

splintered bones

like old wood,

has come to know

the meaning behind

this lesson

has lost the notions

that flight is possible

and that the ground

is soft and yielding

like my lap

this metamorphosis

is more that osteocytes

meeting and re-connecting

his world has shifted - physics 101

to take from him

this moment

would be liberating for me

yet he has chosen to

meet the world

hands down

teeth

today it is some teeth.

life is like that
parts of us being taken
away at intervals

there will be days,
days of loss that
(corporal or not)
will leave a space
an ache, a phantom pain -

life takes its measure
and its token
for the privilege of
walking the road
of one's own desire

teeth; skin to asphalt,
emotional investment,
heartache, accidents,
the dull ache of an empty womb.
Death.

these
are the spaces
where the light
can get in

without loss
there
is
no
light

Leaves

winding round
the bend and back
to where I stand
glazed eyes
scanning

the sun finds its
way through the trees
the leaves return 
themselves 
to the
earth


i stand, alone
connected to
something for
which i have 
no words

no words

just an ache
an unshed tear;
a longing
hopeful
that i will 
find my way
like the sun 

and the leaves

 

inevitable

Inevitable

When i wake,

the cool dry tiles

tell my feet it's morning

long after my eyes open

to the darkness of predawn

thought patterns in flux

from scattered phantoms of

lost night visions

mixed with start up and

download of today's

version of to-do

breathe and wait

breathe and wait

let the day come as it may

as it will, it is inevitable

there is no levy for life

be still and wait

breathe and allow a

place of stillness to form

that guides me to my

next rest as I enter the day

Let's go